Can Women Afford to Date?

Is Chivalry Dead?

It used to always be that the men would pay on the date. But how times have changed. Now it seems, according to a recent article in The New York Times, that women are expected to “go Dutch,” which basically means, pay their own way. One guy complained that he had paid for all the drinks on two dates with a woman. “She doesn’t even pretend to offer, even after I hint,” the San Franciscan complained.

It seems however that this attitude is acceptable and that the guy paying on dates is “outdated.” Sure the man can pay for the woman sometimes, but there again, the woman can pay for the man at other times too. But broaching the subject might be tough as well. There could be some men out there who still believe in chivalry and may be offended or think you’re way too feminist for them if you offer to pay.
The article thus suggests that perhaps on a third date (or earlier, depending on what you’re comfortable with) when the bill arrives, you just turn to your date and ask, “shall we split this?” whether you are the guy or the girl. If your date says no, accept it and then as you carry on dating perhaps offer to pay the whole bill the next time.

But the article also warns men to be wary of women who are just not ever offering to pay. Steer clear of those as they could be taking you on a ride you don’t want to be on.


James Fishman has been involved in the world of online magazines for more than 15 years. He helped launch Sunstone Online and continues to improve the magazine as site editor and administrator. His writing focuses primarily business and technology. To be in touch with James, feel free to contact him at james[at]

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