“Friends with Benefits” Hits Hollywood

A new movie is about to hit Hollywood that successfully touches on a modern real-life phenomenon we are experiencing today. Entitled “Friends with Benefits,” the film focuses on what seems to be a common situation between single men and women in their late 20s, early 30s.  You have a relationship…kinda.  The things is, while you are really having a relationship, you end up not actually committing to one.

Women at Disadvantage Point

Confused? Well, according to the article reporting on this phenomenon in The Daily Mail, for many – especially women – involved in such a set-up, it is.  It seems that in general, the men do really well from it, but the women end up suffering on some level and start to ask what benefits exactly they are reaping.

According to relationship and sex psychotherapist Rachel Morris, “most of the women in these cases are seeking a proper relationship. In a way, it’s likely the man in this relationship is being quite callous. The emotional consequences are huge — and someone is going to get hurt.”  It seems like men have their heads in the clouds and are not getting that they are totally disrespecting these friends: they are usually saying something along the lines of, ‘you’re great; you’re good in bed, I like spending time with you, but you’re not marriage material.’  That is pretty much the worst insult a woman can receive.

Different Bedroom Approaches

The main problem is the way men and women view sex.  And it is completely different.  According to Morris, once a woman becomes intimate in this way, “her feelings change irrevocably in a way that men’s simply don’t.”  This is because, she continues, “a hormone called oxytocin is released in a woman’s brain during sex, which gives her a biological pre-determination to seek a connection with that man.”

Leave it to Hollywood

So perhaps this research has shown that while “Friends with Benefits” may be a great idea in theory, in practice there will be tears before bedtime.  Thus it might just be better to wait for a real relationship and leave the option of “friends with benefits” to a spectator at the movies enjoying a tub of popcorn.


James Fishman has been involved in the world of online magazines for more than 15 years. He helped launch Sunstone Online and continues to improve the magazine as site editor and administrator. His writing focuses primarily business and technology. To be in touch with James, feel free to contact him at james[at]sunstoneonline.com.

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